"I am going to be sick forever"


"I am going to be sick forever." That has been my saying, or motto if you'd  like to call it that, the past couple days.  I only say that because of the mere fact that I absolutely hate being sick, and the thought of what it is like to be healthy, running around, eating anything, smiling, laughing, seems so very, VERY, opposite of what I have been feeling and such a far catch from where I currently reside.   

Patrick, Jonah, and I have all managed to catch the stomach bug. I truly imagine this bug having had pitched a tent in our stomach's, with mere intension to stay awhile and make our lives a living 'you know what'. I know he's in there, (yes, I've given the bug a gender) making himself a home, having lit a fire(the only vision I can have when pains deepen from any food substance) and laughing,  "Bwa HA HA's" while I dwell in misery.  I guess my imagination is still within reach, so I have ONE small aspect of me not affected. Still that leaves the game a far cry from a win.  Sarah: 1, bug of misery: a million.

To say this stomach bug is dreadful is an understatement.  This is awful.  The kind of awful where your body feels like you have been dragged through the most excruciating workout--your muscles throb with no relief. The type when you find yourself tilting your head back for air in attempts to escape waves of nausea. The kind of awful where you reach for anything remotely cool, whether it be the clammy bathroom floor, coldness of the sheets, or in my case, the crisp drink of Gatorade sitting a foot away on my bed stand that I cannot manage to get enough energy to reach for.  

What hurts my heart is that Jonah has endured the same agony that Patrick and I have.  How he managed to crawl around and 'play' for small periods of time is beyond our comprehension.  No wonder his appetite is non-existant, he's had his share of tantrums, and has carried an irritable temperament.  I don't blame him. He's developed this quiet, though high pitched, whimpering sigh that I have learned to be the cries of, "I don't feel good, Mommy." I fully defend that cry now, knowing what it feels like. I wish more acts of comfort were given on my part those days before Patrick and I were hit with this agony. 

I did, however, manage to wake up this morning with some slight bit of relief.  What was once  a continuous headache, now comes and goes.  I can actually walk around my home without feeling waves of nausea. Jonah managed to eat some oatmeal and yogurt this morning, and I think the blunt of it all for Patrick has passed.  So the thought that, "I am going to be sick forever" is slowly diminishing.  Visions of the bug being waterlogged with Gatorade dance in my head.  And the thought of being healthy, running around, laughing, and smiling is something I have learned to not take for granted.  

Prayers go out to anyone whom this dreaded stomach flu has hit.  If I have not described enough-- it is awful and our family fully understands your pain.  There is hope at the end, and I promise, as Patrick has reassured me several times, "You will NOT be sick forever." 

Ahh...the joys of normalcy are in site.


Sammye Jo said...

I sure hope everyone is feeling better!!!!! Hang in there!!

Celia said...

glad you feel better now! lol Im glad you told me about this- i feel like im going to be too- last week I had a stomach bug and this week my wisdom teeth- UGH! You described it perfectly, you are such a great writer! I have experienced the same "mommy guilt" you described here with Jonah's cries going on without realizing the intenstity that he was trying to express. Ahh motherly guilt- now THAT will last forever, eh?

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